The brightest dark

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hey guys, i’ve been trying to play with images and the poems that i write. if you’re interested, go check it out on instagram – @heartlessly_soulful

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New Zealand, you’re so strong and beautiful!

It’s been a week since the attack in Christchurch. It was overwhelming and upsetting when I heard about the news, and of course I instantly felt so worried about my friends in NZ (there’s also a bomb in Auckland near my friend’s apartment) but seeing everyone in the country stands together and supports each other really warms my heart. 

If you have read the first few blog posts that I uploaded before, I wrote this one about NZ. I, myself, am from Hong Kong. Somehow when people ask me where I am from, I don’t seem to feel comfortable when telling them because I feel like I don’t belong to HK. I don’t find a sense of belonging here. I can’t fit into the culture, especially to people, where I’m kinda used to people judging me and I’m at this point where I don’t care anymore. I just want to leave this country.

Due to my previous relationship, I’d go back to NZ once a year during winter time there. I got used to staying there and found myself falling in love with the country more and more everyday. I enjoyed staying there. People there were so nice and friendly. Most importantly, for the first time in my life, I felt like I found a place where I felt free, comfortable and kind of a sense of belonging there. My body has left the country but I definitely left my heart there.

When I was reading the news about the shooting attack in Christchurch, I could not believe what I was reading. I could not believe it happened. I was in shock and at loss of words. The next thought I had was that people could be gone any time because you never know what is going to happen. If you had some friends that you were once so close in NZ, would you reach out to them? Well, I did.

There were actually a lot going on in my head. A country that I love so much and I wish I could be there to support those who were affected. Besides that, my thoughts went to my friends and some people that I once were so closed with. I did not know if caring for them was a right thing to do but I did it anyways. The most I could do was sending them a text to make sure they’re okay and to stay safe.

However, the most ridiculous thing was that I tried to reach out to this person that I haven’t talked in nearly 9 months and I once loved so much. I don’t know how he feels about me anymore but my intention was just to ask him to stay safe, nothing else. I just didn’t want myself to regret if there’s anything happens. You just never know. It turned out he didn’t reply. He didn’t even open the message. At that point, I felt kinda silly, but at least I did what I wanted and what I could.

I keep up to the news up till today. Seeing people of different races in NZ rebuilding their ground and have come together stronger, as well as how the leader of the country, Jacinda Ardern, has handled the whole situation with compassion and love, really set a good example for other countries and people in the world. There’s so much love in NZ that makes me fall in love with it even more from far away. Not only is the country beautiful on its look, but also its heart. You’re beautiful inside out. 

New Zealand, I might not be there with you physically but my heart is with you, always. 

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AJ Hickling – a famous Queenstown busker

I was lucky enough to witness and capture this amazing scene in front of me at the time. Queenstown itself is a beautiful place, and with the music along, it was just a cherry on top. Not only did this guy’s music bring joy to my ears, but also touched my soul in all kinds of ways.

I’d go there every morning just to watch and listen to him play the piano after breakfast. If only I could stay there all day, and before I had that thought, I got pulled away to somewhere already. The schedule was tight!

What makes his music even more special and soulful to me is that the piano he plays was found at the dump and repaired by him. It was small enough to fit in his van, and he would busk around with it here and there in nz, mainly in queenstown I believe.

I have a lot of unforgettable memories from traveling, but this is definitely one of the most meaningful ones.

ps check out his music and his background and thank me later!

Head in the clouds

Clouds above my head gathering together,

They blur my vision even when I’m sober.

Reaching ahead as I find my way out

While I follow the clouds with no doubt.

Lead me to the top of the mountain;

All the nuisances and frauds,

I know I shouldn’t listen.

-c

 

**anyone wanna write and create something together? poems, prose, songs, anything.  I wanna learn from all you creative people and broaden my vision of how others create and write their work. If you’re keen, just hit me up hehe. have a wonderful day xx

 

 

 

 

Planes

I used to get excited when I saw a plane.

Until I met you,

It was more than what I saw.

It took away your stress and sadness.

It brought you joy and freedom.

It brought me to you,

and you to me.

See you soon, we said.

You faded away just like that,

I saw it off,

looking until it was out of sight.

-c